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"Uneasy Rider"
by Charles Daniels

I was takin' a out to LA
toolin' along in my
tokin' on a number and diggin' on the
as I cross the Mississippi line
I heard that start to whine
and I knew that left tire was about to go
the spare was flat and I got uptight
'cause there wasn't a station in sight
so I jes' limped down the on the rim
I went as far as I and when I stopped the car
it was right in front of this bar
a kind of a redneck lookin' joint the Dew Drop Inn
well I my hair up under my hat
and told the that I had a flat
and he be kind enough to give me change for a one
was one thing I was sure proud to see
there wasn't a soul in the 'cept for him an' me
and he jest looked an' pointed toward the telephone
I called up the down the road a ways
and he said he wasn't very t'day
and he could somebody there in jest 'bout ten minutes or so
he now you jes' stay right where yer at and I didn't bother tellin'
the durn fool I sure as hell didn't anyplace else to go
I jes up a beer and sat down at the bar
when some guy in an' said who owns this car
with the sign the mag wheels and four on the floor
well he looked at me and I damn near
and I decided that I'd jus wait
so I layed a dollar on the bar and headed for the
jes' when I thought I'd get outta there with my
these five big dude strollin' in
with this one old drunk chick and some fella with teeth
an' I was to the door when the biggest one
said you tip your hat to lady son
an' when I did all that hair fell out underneath
now the last thing I wanted was to get into a
in Mississippi on a Saturday night
'specially there was three of them and only one of me
well they all started laughin' and I felt sick
and I knew I'd think of somethin' pretty quick
so I jes' out an' kicked ol' green-teeth right in the knee
he let out a yell curl your hair
but before he could I grabbed me a chair
and said him folks 'cause he's a thouroughly dangerous man
well you may not know it but man's a spy
he's an agent for the FBI
and he's been sent down here to the Ku Klux Klan
he was still bent over holdin' on to his
but else was lookin' and listenin' to me
and I layed it on thicker and heavier as I
I said you beleive this man has gone as far
as tearin' Wallace stickers off the of cars
and he voted for George for president
well he's a friend of long-haired hippie type pinko fags
I betcha he's got a Commie flag
Tacked up on the wall inside of his
a snake in the grass I tell ya guys
he may look dumb but that's jus a
he's a mastermind in the of espionage
they all started lookin' suspicious at him
and he jumped up an' said wait a minute jim
you know he's I've been livin' here all of my life
I'm a faithfull follower of Brother Burch
and I belong to the Baptist Church
and I even got a garage you can call home and ask my wife
then he started somethin' 'bout the way I was dressed
but I didn't wait around to hear the
I was too busy movin' and hopin' I didn't run luck
and when I hit the I was makin' tracks
and were jes' takin' my car down off the jacks
so I threw the man a twenty an' jumped in an' that mother up
Mario Andretti woulda sure been
of the way I was movin' when I passed that
comin' out the and headin' toward me in a trot
an' I I shoulda gone ahead an' run
but somehow I resist the fun
of chasin' them jes' around the parkin' lot
well they're for their car but I hit the gas
and spun around and headed off at the pass
well I was slingin' gravel and a ton of dust in the air
well I had them all out there steppin' an' a
like their were on fire and their asses was catchin'
but I figured I oughta go ahead an split before the cops got
when I hit the road I was really
had gravel and rubber squeelin'
an' I didn't slow down I was almost to Arkansas
I think I'm gonna my trip
I wonder if anybody'd think I'd
if I to LA via Omaha