Ladies and May I have your please? Do you wake morning in shame and despair To discover your pillow is covered with ought not to be there?
Well, ladies and From now on you can waken with You need never again a worry or care I will show you a miracle marvelous Gentlemen, you are about to see What rose the dead on the top of my head
'Twas Miracle elixir That's did the trick, sir True, sir, true, was it quick, Did it in a tick, sir like an elixir ought to do
How a bottle, mister? Only a penny, guaranteed Penny a bottle, I don't know You need, ah, let's go
Go and tug, sir Go ahead, sir, Does stimulate the growth, sir? You can my oath, sir
'Tis unique, rub a Stimulatin', you'll have to thin it Once a
dab it, gets to be a habit Soon be enough, sir can grab it See that chap with hair Shelley's? You can tell 'e's Pirelli's
Let me have a that two Pardon me, sir, what's that awful Smells to me like piss and looks ink
Buy Pirelli's elixir Anything slick, sir Soon curls, try Pirelli's they see how thick, sir You can your pick, sir, of the girls
See Miracle elixir Grow a wick, sir some fuzz, the Pirelli's Soon'll it thick, sir Like a good elixir always
Pirelli's If hair is sick, sir Fix it in a nick, sir Don't grim Pirelli's miracle elixir do the trick, sir
What about the If got a kick, sir What about the Where is Pirelli? Go and get
Tell it to the Of the miracle If got a kick, sir What about our Where is this