Luyện nghe bài hát The Hypnotist

Performed by adam sandler and

by big brother.

[typing
Dr. stewart: hi, dr. stewart.
Gary phelps: hi, dr. stewart. to meet you -- I'm gary phelps.
Dr. stewart: my pleasure. gary, have you ever hypnotized before?
Gary phelps: no, I haven't. I'm actually nervous, but I just, uh, I --
Dr. stewart: all right, and you referred to me by anyone...?
Gary phelps: to be honest with you, I saw your name in the yellow pages, and it said you're good at this stuff, so I just, I gotta it a shot, just kick this whole cigarette thing...
Dr. stewart: so smoking is problem?
Gary phelps: yeah, I can't stop smoking and it's -- it's finally, like, affecting everything I do, I can't run, I can't play basketball and all stuff like that, so i, I gotta give it up.
Dr. stewart: how have you smoked, gary?
phelps: uh, I started when I was eleven years old, and I just can't kick it, you know?

Dr. stewart: yeah, right. [small, barely noticeable fart] all right, gary, why don't you just have a seat here and sit down and just relax -- I do is hypnosis.
Gary right.
Dr. stewart: basically I just want you to sit back and relax -- let yourself sit back and relax and sink into the chair, and , um, just feel and trust me.

[bigger
Gary phelps: [noticing fart uh...
Dr. stewart: it.
Gary o-kay....
Dr. that's it.
Gary that was...o-kay...
Dr. stewart: all right? okay. gary, I want you to close your eyes, and I just want you to again relax and try to concentrate on nothing. okay? that's it. now I'm gonna count from five
Ro --
phelps: right.
Dr. stewart: -- and I just want you to relax, and you're going to fall into a deep state of mind -- of subconsciousness -- you're very comfortable, I'll be counting back five, I just want y
Relax, and think of nothing.
[three farts in
Gary phelps: are you gonna keep that, or...?
Dr. stewart: hmm? just concentrate now. that's it. your eyes. keep your eyes closed. okay. now. we're very comfortable. five [small fart], we're thinking of nothing except being comfortabl
Nothing's bothering us. okay. when I say the word "relax," listen to me, sinking, you're sinking, [medium fart]
phelps: oh my god...that was, uh....are you gonna keep doing that?
Dr. stewart: please try to relax; that wasn't me. okay. you're very stressed -- you're very stressed. okay, four, we're relaxing, we're relaxing, you're very comfortable, you're very, very
Ed. okay. four, three...[fart]
phelps: oh my dear god, sir...uh, I can't...
Dr. stewart: that was the couch. I know it sounded like -- it's -- the vinyl -- it's a new -- please, just try and concentrate. okay. and we're very sleepy, we're relaxed, thinking nothing
Ers us, bothers us -- [several farts]
Gary phelps: uh, um, all right, could you open a window, I'm just having a tough time concentrating --
Dr. hmm? here we go -- there, there, we're relaxing, we're relaxing [fart and cough together] three, two, two --
phelps: I was just going to ask you if you could maybe stop doing that. I can't concentrate when you're doing that.
Dr. stewart: this is I do. it's a counting-down thing. we're relaxing now. just relax -- let it go, don't focus on anything else, just concentrate on what we're doing here. three, two, rela
Lax, that's it, relax [fart], we're relaxing now --
Gary phelps: okay -- you're gonna -- that one was -- getting a little irritating --
Dr. hang on just a second here. let me just step out a second here.
Gary that'd be good.
Dr. stewart: all right, and we're relaxing, as I leave, relaxing, still relaxing,
[fart in the
phelps: jesus...oh my god.
Dr. we're relaxing.
Gary phelps: [trying hard not to
Dr. stewart: okay, I'm back, we're relaxing, and counting down, we're to two, and all we're thinking about is healthy, fresh air. freshness. breathing in. breathing in deep, letting out. [

phelps: sir, I'd appreciate if you could stop 'letting it out'. but okay, okay, fine, thank you.
Dr. stewart: that's it, you're all right, everything's good. all right, you feel very comfortable, you're into the chair, we're relaxing, one [long fart], and we're coming down to zero a

Gary oh my god, uh...yes, all right, it was nothing...
Dr. stewart: no, no, time that was you.
phelps: that wasn't me!

Dr. we're not here to pick sides, we're not here to pick sides, that was you, and maybe we could deal with this in another session, but right now we're dealing with the smoking, and, um
's not worry anything else that's going down --
Gary phelps: ok, I've just kick this habit.
Dr. stewart: down to zero, relaxing, we're going to feel very fresh [fart], going to feel very healthy [fart], and let's take a nice, deep breath --
Gary phelps: I can't breathe, sir, uh, I'm sorry, I -- ["squirty" fart]
phelps: oh my God -- what did you eat? it smells like baby food --

Dr. stewart: all right, we're relaxing -- that one probably squirted out a little into the pants, but we'll just continue with floating [fart] -- yeah, that was definitely a squirt -- but h
E go, one, zero, we are under. are you
Gary yeah, I'm under, I guess.
Dr. stewart: here we go, relaxing, relaxing. you're under a deep trance, you will not smoke anymore, you will feel healthy from now on, and you'll be breathing in nothing but fresh air, and
Will not smell anything in this room, it wasn't me, it wasn't me farting [fart] -- was not me --
Gary phelps: [hysterically laughing under his breath] you're gonna to stop doing that, sir. it's just very hard for me to listen to you when you're --
Dr. stewart: floating now, you're high above, you're looking down, nothing but fresh pastures and fields, and here we go [long fart]
phelps: oh man...
Dr. stewart: -- was you,
Gary phelps: was not me, sir! I'm watching you!
Dr. stewart: was you, and when you wake up, you will not remember any of this, except that it was you, or my receptionist, don't worry, she gets it all the time. all right -- you smell noth
I'm perfectly clean. I have no bad gas; it was all from outside or from -- from -- you yourself. and let's not forget the thing that's why you're here. no smoking. repeat after me: I am
Lly pig.
Gary phelps:
Dr. stewart: all right, moving along, and we;'re relaxed. [fart] all right, and now we're going to count back up, up one to five,
Gary phelps: ok, you know, I think this is fine, I don't to smoke...
Dr. stewart: gary, settle down, relax, and when I get to five, you will snap out of this, and you remember this, especially the smell, the smell was from you. all right? and here we go. ze
E're coming out of it, you're waking up slowly, your eyes are opening, one, you're feeling good, and when you wake up, you'll feel wide awake and perfect you'll whole and [fart] all-righty,
that one out there and I apologize. I ripped a good one there. that was a nice out..
Gary that was not nice.
Dr. stewart: here we go, and, we're coming [fart]
Gary phelps: what was
Dr. that was three.
Gary it didn't sound like three.
Dr. stewart: three, I'm counting, and four, it's no smell in here, and you don't smoke, you don't want a cigarette, no, and we go [fart] five, and -- [snap] do you want a cigarette?
phelps: no I don't.
Dr. then my job is done.
Gary phelps: [bursts into
Dr. stewart: [fart] please leave the door open as you leave.
Gary phelps: ok, you, doctor.

[typing resumes and another is heard]