Luyện nghe bài hát Two

Now if you're me on Twitter you know i had diarrhea today.
Am i using web site properly?
Sometimes I to sit one the toilet reverse. . .
"we're listening..."
it right?
you can turn around, you can on the tank.
"I'm gonna be for awhile..."
Yea, the that are clapping right now are the ones that are like "ok, all kidding aside he is a genius."
No, no, no it's the simplicity, i've been sitting on that thing my life, and you're telling me i can turn around, have a bowl of cereal, yea.
Set the ten minutes later... MULTITASK.
Alright, nobody should eat on the toilet.
"But i'm intolerant, and i've always wanted to enjoy a bowl of Puffins with whole milk."
It's more of an almond milk cereal, but live dream.
Somebody e-mailed me and they were "Hey Dipshit"
Which for the record is a subject line if you ever want me to read your e-mails.
Oh, let's see this nice fan has to say
You had me at hello.
" you know you have to take your pants completely off to sit on the toilet backwards.

Alright, so i research.
It's a pre-shower shit,
Can we move on, sticklers to joke detail?
You ever have a post shit?
Awe, might as go back to bed and start your whole day over.
THINGS. ARE. WRONG. That's not the order of events, a glitch in the matrix, this world's not real.
MOM, me.
I recently started ironing my ball hair.
Come on ladies, you know how it is, if you have curly hair you just straight hair.
So now when people see my balls like "oh my goodness, that looks really,really good."
Isnt damaging to the hair?
And im "yea, but what are you gonna do?"
I wish victoria beckham would knock it off with all the dues, i can't keep up.
My balls still have the '06
Remember that lil, trendy little
Spice!
Looks my testicles.
Am i the only person that hopes David has sex with Brad Pitt?
I don't know who's in charge of casting in Hollywood, but it happen before one of them is out of their prime.
Can you those two men together, making love?
If there is a man in here that's junk doesn't just a little bit, at the thought of those two men together.
This has nothing to do with your sexual preference, at that level it's art you monkey, ok?
You should be honored you share the same restroom with those greek gods.
Can you if they had a child?
Was Simba!?!?!?
What the fuck, was that
the Beckham-Pitt kid?
That's cum?
The most beautiful child the world has seen.
Picture baby Jesus. . . with abs.
That's a good baby.
If they had a baby abercrombie store, they would him to work the front door, right?
standing there, shirtless, propped up, he can't stand yet. Just leaning against the wall.
Think poster, big poster of himself, standing there, little tight pampers.
And you'd walk in, and be like "I dont wanna say this, but i wanna fuck that baby."
Oh man, do i wanna that baby.
If i had three wishes, two of them would be to fuck that baby, and one would be for wishes.
you can't do that. . .
Then i wanna fuck baby a third time.
I would like to use all three wishes that baby
Go ahead dumb people, be offended by a joke doesn't have a plausible premise/
Oh, i'd to read your e-mail.
"I you went over the line a bit, when you theoretically wanted to fornicate with a mythical child."
Heads up Mormons, joke's gonna sting.
Next a golden plate falls from the heavens, go ahead and put it in your spam file.
Let's not base your entire life on a that's old enough for my dad to be like "Oh yea, that's not true... uh, that didn't happen"
I don't know why they're wearing their pajamas under clothes.
I assume their god wants to be comfy.
The Mormon church 20 million dollars last year, in the state of California, making sure queers didn't legally get married, successfully i might add.
So i guess we're not as as we all thought.
And this is what i say to the most conservative person so terrified of gay marriage becoming legal.
Just because the says its legal, it's not like god's gonna let them into heaven.

So you can still sleep sound every night knowing that goal line is up at the pearly gates just going